Readings and homework to be completed for 12/02 and 12/04

Write this in your homework agenda!

Bring all of these books to class on Friday if you are not at XC; and take home any you have not finished reading for the weekend.  Ms. M. will supervise Friday's class. 

Readings to be completed for Monday 12/02:
- 'The other side of dark' - finished
- 'Language and Writing 7' on Comparison, pp. 62 and 63
- 'Working Together Magazine', p. 35
- 'Mystery and Wonder Magazine', p. 13

Readings to be completed for Wednesday 12/04:
- 'Language and Writing 7' on Travelogues, pp. 70 and 71
- 'Mystery and Wonder Magazine', pp. 14-18, pp. 21-23

Grammar Apps to be completed for Monday 12/02:
- adjectives and adverbs
- do passive voice again, if you got below 70%
- do any of the others that are a weakness

Homework, week of 11/25

Write this in your homework agenda!
Readings for the weekend:
- 'The other side of dark' - chapters 10 through 12 read by Monday, 11/25

Most interesting C-building character writing:
- due Wednesday, 11/27

- printed before class, Wednesday

- emailed to Mr. S. before class, Wednesday (I have to check for plagiarism), as an attachment

- between 300 and 500 words

- in sentences and paragraphs

- your name and a title

- format is Times New Roman 12, black, double-spaced

You will write four to six paragraphs.  Do not spend all of your time describing the look and character of the person only: that's not interesting.  'Show don't tell'.  Describe them doing something, like the Chinese mother in the poem.

 Practice reading it aloud before Wednesday!  Or, if you decide to do a Powerpoint, video, or something else, make sure the entire thing is finished before Wednesday's class.

Due 11/18: setting readings and writing

Write this in your homework agenda!

Readings for the weekend:
- The other side of dark - chapters 7 through 9
- Working Together Magazine - 'My partner, my dog', 'What's your group personality', 'My mother, who came from China...'.

Setting Writing due Monday:

- printed before class, Monday

- emailed to Mr. S. before class, Monday (I have to check for plagiarism), as an attachment

- take the point form notes you wrote and presented on a setting and expand them to between 300 and 500 words

- in sentences and paragraphs

- your name and a title

- format is Times New Roman 12, black, double-spaced

Like the story set in Peru, in 'Working Together Magazine', you will describe one location several times during the day, or several times during a year.  You will write four to six paragraphs, one for each different time of the day (or year).  You can use the notes on a setting you read the other day, or do a completely new location.

We will talk about this more in Friday's class while reviewing this week's readings (bring your two 'magazines').

Practice reading it aloud before Monday!

Grade Seven Reading by 11/11

Not very much after all.  Just 'Running Lava Falls' in the 'Working Together Anthology'.  Enjoy your weekend.

HS K, also edited too much.

Sweets to green

                                                                                                              

                  There was a girl that was 17 called Terry Hart. She loved chocolate. But she did not have the taste that she wanted so she decided to make one. She became fatter every day. Every day she ditched school and ate chocolate until she got the taste that she wanted.

Five years later she made a chocolate bar that was filled with crushed peppermint candy, wasabi paste, worm gummies, glanced mozzarella cheese, bubble gum, peanut butter, strawberry jam and kimchi. She owned her own store named terry hart’s wonderful chocolate bars.

                              Everyday a lot of people came to terry’s store. At that time she weight 220kg. One day she saw a handsome man buying her products. Terry fell in love with him. Then Terry found out that he was the owner of the famous salad bar called green yum. She heard from her friend that his name was Collin Monroe.  She decided to go on a diet to make him fall in love with Terry.

 She tried everything to lose weight but everything didn’t work. She realized that maybe if she gave Collin a delicious dish he would fall in love with her. She bought a farm and she began to plant vegetables.  She was so tired because she didn’t experienced this before that she couldn’t eat. The next day she watered the plants every day. Terry ate fresh salad and vegetables to give Collin a very enjoyable dish. After one year Terry weigh 45 kilograms. She loosed 175 kilogram in one year.

 Terry saw Collin at her store so she invited Collin to her house. Collin came and when he ate her salad his eyes was full with joy because he never ate this kind of delicious salad before. Three years later Collin and Terry got married.

M O B, edited much more than she had to.

Wanka’s Adventure

                                                                             Fantasy/Adventure

            “Wanka, wake up!” Wanka jumped out of her bed. “Urgh, another exciting day starting”, Wanka muttered sarcastingly. She washed her face with cold, freezing water and changed into her casual clothes. She made her way downstairs, and slumped on her usual chair. “Good morning honey” her grandma, Amanda said smiling. “Yeah yeah good morning” Wanka felt like her eyelids weighed a ton. She slowly fell asleep…But suddenly, Amanda hit her head with a fry pan. “Ouch! Why did you do that?” Wanka grunted. “Wanka Brooks eat your breakfast” Wanka finally started eating her breakfast but staring straight at Amanda. 

            Later that afternoon, Wanka went to a flower shop to buy flowers for her grandma. It was Amanda’s 60^th birthday, so she was planning to buy 60 roses for her. But Wanka was going to be 16, so she added 16 roses. There were 100 beautiful roses in the entrance and she bought 60 roses from them. Wanka also bought a big colorful vase. She was really excited to see Amanda’s face when she gives her present to her. Wanka went home running, but then suddenly, a man in black suit came towards her and smothered her with a handkerchief soaked in ether and Wanka fell asleep… When she woke up, she found herself in her own house. She looked around, but no one was around her. There was a note on the table, but someone was missing. It was Amanda. She dropped the vase with the roses in it and the glass clattered all over the floor.

            On the note, a simple map was drawn. There was a picture of a tree, a picture of an ocean, and a picture of a mountain. On the top right side of the map, there was a big X. She knew right away that she needed to save her grandma from whoever or whatever had taken her. She jumped out of the house and started heading towards the forest. But then suddenly, everything went black. First she saw a big forest with big giant trees and animals noises booming. Next, she a big ocean with huge waves and thunder storms stroking down. Then she was on top of a humongous mountain with blizzard around her. Finally, she saw a dark silent cave with her grandma in mouth duct taped. She shook her head and she was back to normal. Wanka put the map in her pocket and made her way into the forest.

            The forest was big and sticky, but she didn’t care. Well, only a little bit. She went walked straight not knowing where she was going. Wanka shivered and thought of the worst possible situation that might happen. Like not able to find Amanda and getting lost. Suddenly, she just couldn’t hold it, and burst into tears. “Amanda…” Wanka felt terrible and felt like going back. But of course, she couldn’t leave Amanda. So she chose to go find Amanda again, this time for real. “BUZZZZZ” she heard noises from behind her. When she turned around, millions of bugs came straight towards her. She ran as FAST as she could straight forward. Then, she saw the way out. She dashed towards it and reached out side. The millions of bugs went back into the forest, like nothing had happened. Wanka now headed to the ocean.

            After she walked about a kilometer or so, she saw a big wide ocean. The color of the ocean was beautiful, even though there were strong waves. Wanka saw a long bridge ahead of her, and saw a humongous mountain across it. She knew right away that she needed to cross the bridge to save her grandma. So Wanka started crossing the bridge, but it was really long. She thought it would take forever to cross the bridge. Eight minutes had past crossing the bridge, but she wasn’t even half way across. Suddenly, she heard a CRACK in the sky. Wanka started running. “CRACK”. Another thunder clap. The rain became harder too. Then, the lighting hit the end of the bridge and the bridge slowly started to go. Now Wanka was running full speed, and she made it, but she started heading to the mountain right away.

            Up Wanka looked, and the mountain looked even bigger. She was really worried if she could really go up that high, but then she saw a gondola next to her. She got in it right away, and headed all the way up the mountain with it. It took about thirty minutes to go all the way up, and then strong freezing wind pushed her from the back and she slipped forwards. She couldn’t stop. Then…she fell down from the mountain.

            She fell faster and faster, and the ground was getting close to her. She closed her eyes. But then, she stopped about a centimeter before landing. She slowly landed on the ground. She couldn’t believe it. Wanka stood up and didn’t say a word. But then next to her, she saw a dark cave, and knew right away that her grandma was inside, so rushed inside. First she couldn’t see a thing, but then, she saw a flare far ahead. Running, she reached the end of the cave, and stood there speechless. There was a chair but no one was sitting in it.

L X

In this vacation he go back to Canada once but he still miss his friends and grandparents so he just talk to his parents can he go back to Canada again because he still have one month vacation. “NO! You already go back once, why again? Okay, IF you can, how about the plane flights, you know it is very expensive if we don’t buy it before a month!” Dad reply soon.

So he get an idea how to get an Xbox in Japan, a night he jump to his mom and dad’s bed and talk to them about this.“Can you buy me an Xbox? Please, because I am very bored in Japan! 99% off my classmate went to Hawaii or Los Angles, some of them even go back to Vancouver, can I go back, too?”Omar asked. “Emm, you know, the people move to another country with the language we don’t understand anything, especially in the third month and the forth month. Because in the first month and second month we just though here is a fun place and a lot of new thing here that we don’t have in Canada, so it’s hard to spend every day. That is all what I want to say, Oh, and also in the afternoon maybe you can go to any where if you want to. OK?” Omar doesn’t reply, he just goes back to his room and start playing games on his phone…

Y T, same as K S!

The Secret Door 

                                                                Science/ Adventure                            

   There were 12 years old girl who named Emily. She lived in Toronto, Canada. She has fun in school. Explore was her favorite thing. She wanted to go on a big adventure. One day, when Emily came back from the school, her mom shouted, “Clean up your room!” Emily replied “O.K, O.K, O.K” Her room was messy. “Why do I need to clean this room?” Emily asked to herself. She moved the desk away to clean the floor. Then, she saw a door. “What’s this?” she asked to herself. Emily tried to open the door. She wanted to do an adventure. At the same time, she remembers that her mother saying to clean her room. But, she couldn’t hold her patience and opens the door. Emily thinks. “Try your best and do what you want!” Emily heard a voice in her mind and remembers what the teacher said. Suddenly, Emily’s mom came into the room. Emily closed the door. Her mom shouted “Did you clean up your room?” “Yes! Can’t you see it?” Emily shouted back. Then mother replied, “I can see it! Don’t say like that to your mom Emily. Get back to cleaning.” The mother shut the door, SLAM. Emily went into the door. There was a ladder, so she went down, and came to a room. “Wow” Emily almost screamed. There were so many doors all around the room. “What is this door? Can I go in?” Emily had so many questions. She picked a door. In the top of the door, it was written “The Future World”. Emily’s hand was shivering as she reached the door knob. She holds the door knob and twisted it. Opened slowly and Emily went in.

The room got lighter. “It’s bright” Emily complained. “Wow” Emily’s emotions changed. In front of her eyes, there was a room that Emily dreamed to live. One girl entered the room. She was surprised. She said to Emily nicely, “Hello, My name is Emma.” Emma was speechless. Emma was wearing a futuristic blue suit. It was like a diving suit. Emily started to talk, “Hi, my name is Emily. Where is here?” Emma answered, “You are in the future. You came here by the door. Correct?” “Yes. But how did you know?” Emily was so confused. “Oh, sorry I forgot to explain about it. It will be a long story, my grandfather made this door for fun. He loves to make things.” “Wow! Your grandfather made this door?” asked Emily. “Yes, he did. Do you want to see more doors in that room?” Emma asked Emily. “Yes! Yes! I want to see more.” Emily was so excited. Emma opens the door and went inside into the darkness. It was that room that Emily had came before. Emma stood in front of the door that was written “The Animal World” Emily chased Emma. “Are we going here?” asked Emily. “Yes,” answered Emma as usual. They opened the door and went in. They walked into the darkness. They arrived to a jungle.

There were so many animals. They were all looking at the girls! They looked like human. Suddenly, the animals started running towards them. “Help me!” screamed Emily. Emma took out a badge from her pocket. “Use this!” Emma shouted. Emily puts on the badge. The animal stopped chasing. Emily and the animals knew what they are speaking each other. “How do they know what I’m speaking?” Emily asked to Emma. “You put a badge. This badge translates automatically to two languages.” Emma explained. Emma speak to the animals. “Hi, my name is Emma. Nice to meet you.” Emma spoke as normal. One of the animal answered “Hi, welcome to our world. You know what we are talking?” “Yes” replied Emma. Emily couldn’t believe she was having this conversation. The animal went. Emily and Emma went to see what the animal world looks like. They swigged with ropes, raced, swim in the lake, and had fun. Then Emma said, “We are out of the jungle.” Emily stopped running. Emily couldn’t say anything. It was amazing. The town was full with solar panels. They weren’t using trees at all. They went down to the town. There were only animals that lived there. Everyone was doing normal things like humans. While they were seeing the town, the animal president was having a conference. Emily went to a shopping and Emma was finding a place to sleep at night.

 At the night, Emma brings out from her pocket a squashed house. She started to brow it with a machine. “Finished” Emma says. “Is this a house?” Emily asked. “Yes. A camping house. There are two rooms. There was a bed, toilet, table, foods, clothes, and bathroom. It was enough. “Good night” they both said at the same time.

   In the morning, they ate an omelet. This omelet was a little different from 2013, but the taste was same. Emily wanted to go back to her own house. Emily didn’t say to Emma because she wanted to know more things on animal world. They went outside the house. “Help! Help!” Both of them screamed. When they went outside, they got caught. They were horse and wolf. Emily and Emma got scared. Emma tried to get something from the pocket. The rope was in the way. The house and wolf put them down. They were in a room. Emma tried to take out the rope, but they couldn’t. Someone came into the room. “Hallo, you guys. Welcome to Animals World” the lion said. “I’m the president of this world.” “President? What are you trying to do to us?” asked Emily. “Yes I’m the president. If you want to know the second question, see this.” The president pushes a remount button. A big television came down. It was big as the room wall. “Look at this. We had made a weapon’s.” The president shouted. “Why?” Emma asked. “We, the animals are going to have the whole earth. We are going to have the earth for the animals!” the President. “Why you are doing this?” Emily complained. “You guys, the human were cutting down the trees, burning the forest, making gas and many things. Now, we don’t have space to live. We need to have the whole world and make the world a better place.” The president says to the girls. Emma and Emily couldn’t say anything. The president continued, "In six hour we are going to attack the earth. In 2013 the earth will be ours." Emma notices that they were trying to attack were Emily lives now. "It's your world" Emma whispered to Emily. "Yes. I know it." Emily panicked. The president said "Good luck! I am going come back later, before the attack starts. Hahahaha" and leaved the room. Emily tried to taking out Emma's rope, but they couldn't. They couldn't walk too. The rope was also tied up on their foot. Emily starts speaking "What will happen to the earth? How about my mom and dad? Can we help them? What they are trying to do?" "Emily wait. Breathe. We don't know what is going now. But we must take this rope out and stop them" Emma explained. Emily asked “But how do we take this rope out?" "I don't know!" Emma answered. Both of them stopped speaking.

Four hours past. They started to speak. Emma said "It’s already four hours past." Emma had a clock. Emily continued "Two hours left" "Em" Emily heads a squeak sounds of the door and stopped speaking. It was the president. “Nice to see you again" Emily and Emma stared the president. He didn't notice. "Two hours left." Emily speaks "Can you stop this? We want to go back home." The president says "No!" Emily and Emma were so confused what to do.

 After two hours, the president came to the room. The president said “Finally! We can have the world. Attack!” The animal’s airplane starts attacking. “No! That is unfair” Emily shouted. But the president didn’t care about it and went out the room. Emily and Emma were thinking what they could do. There was no idea. “There is a piece of glass there.” said Emma. “What? We can use it to cut the rope.”Emily shouted. They reached the piece of glass and cut the ropes. The door was luckily opened. They escaped from the castle and ran to the forest. Emma brought out an airplane from the pocket and browed it. They went to the space. They didn’t know what to do, and went back to the castle and meet the president. The president screamed, “How did you get out from there?” “There are more things that we want to speak to you. Please stop the attacking.”Emily asked. The president answered, “Why do we need to stop? You guys take our place where we lived. Also, the airplanes are already attacking Japan.” “I am very sorry about that. We will try our best to make the earth better” said Emily. Emma continued, “I know a planet that it is almost the same with earth. There is enough water and lands. I will show you the planet. Please stop attacking the earth.” The president thinks for five minutes. He said to the animals “Stop! And come back.” Emily and Emma feel happy at the same time.

 Emily and Emma showed them the planet and helped them make their own city. Emily said to the animals “We will make the earth better. Come back and let’s live together.”

 Emily and Emma went back to their own house and fixed the world. After that, they plant the tree seeds. Also, they were very careful about other eco friendly things, too. They tried to make the earth better, so the animals can live again, as they promised to the animals.

 The End

To be continue…

K S edited too much, because he listens poorly.

The Mysterious Rock

            One day, John went on a hunting trip with his son. They were hunting for the caribou. They saw a caribou that was lying on the ground. Beside the caribou, there was a mysterious rock that was shining green. The caribou’s eyes were glowing green just like the rock. John then carefully took the rock back home without touching.

            John had a friend, Paul. He showed the rock to Paul.  Paul said that he hasn’t seen any rock like that. John then searched on the internet about a glowing rock. He found no rock. Then Matthew went and touched the rock. As soon as Matthew touched the rock, he started to scream. Matthew then bit everyone. The zombies soon took over the all of Canada.

            Down in America, the president just heard the news. He sent his army into Canada to fight. The U.N. soon made a team with the best scientists. The team was sent onto a big navy ship where they would stay safe. The team sent orders from the ship. They had a plan to shut off one small city with a gigantic wall. They chose Vatican City. Using millions of people they built the wall before the zombies came.

          The zombies came non-stop. The zombie came in more numbers every time they came. They would grab the soldiers standing at the edge and kill them.

            Back on the ship, one of the scientists was Paul. He told the team about the rock he saw. The team figured that the rock was the answers to all the questions and mysteries they had. Paul also said that the rock was in a small village in Yukon. The team then started a mission to find the rock and bring it back.

           The team sent one helicopter to the village. The team also found out that the zombies had very good hearing. The mission was taken place with ten men. The ten men were the best sodliers. They quietly moved into the house the rock was in. They found the rock. They then flew back to the ship. On the ship they took the rock and created an antidote that could kill any zombie. The used the antidote on the zombies.

N K, finished.

309 to 204: good job.

     Shin was waiting under a tree; suddenly he saw an old car that was parking. There was no driver, and then he heard a strange sound. He saw somebody walking around. When he looked up, that man didn’t have a head! He wanted to run away, but he promised Kent. He gets a deep breath, and then he went away. Then Kent was running toward Shin. They went to an old house.

     They went in but there was nothing except a bin, Kent took a bin. There was blue water inside, Kent licked it!! Then he saw ghosts around them, then that bin disappeared he took Shin’s hand and walked toward. Shin didn’t know why he won’t go back to home. Shin suddenly felt cold hands, which were Kent’s hand then he fill down.

     When Kent opened his eyes he was in hospital. Kent saw Shin. He had a lot of stenches in his body. Shin was crying because he can’t save Kent, but Kent wasn’t wired about it.

     Three month later Shin and Kent get out from hospital, and they told their story in old house. Everyone was excited but that building got crashed. Now Shin and Kent was famous in their school.

     Shin was waiting under a tree; suddenly he saw an old car that was parking. There was no driver inside he looked around, but there was nothing like a market or store he heard something strange. He hides behind a tree someone came out and he shouted, “Hey, Ken…..t?” his hight was too hight for Kent and it was stinky like a blood when he looked up that man didn’t have a head.　It was a headless ghost he wanted to run away, but he promised to Kent that he will help him. He get a deep breath and what him to drive away. Then he saw Kent running toward him, Kent slept a little bit so he was late. Now they started to go into an old house.

     They went in but there was nothing except a green bin, Kent looked at that bin. He notice that it wasn’t a poison so he licked it then he could see a ghost around him, then that bin disappeared he took Shin’s hand and walked to see more ghosts. Shin asked him, “If you can see a ghost why don’t we go home and play video game?” Kent didn’t answer. Shin walked together with Kent, Shin suddenly felt cold hands, which were Kent’s hand then he fill down. Shin carried him and get out from an old house.

     When Kent opened his eyes there was Kent’s parents and Shin, Kent was surprised with Shins hurts there was a lot of stenches in his body. Shin was crying that he couldn’t save the promise and he was happy because didn’t die.

     Three month later Shin and Kent get out from hospital and talked about an old house. Everyone was excited but that building got crashed. Since then everyone called Shin, “A wild ghost hunter”, and Kent was called, “Genius ghost scientist”.

Good work, Y K.

299 to 203.

Once upon a time mid night at fairy town, the wolf was riding a taxi and he was trying to go where toads are. (Toad is in the fairy tail that was made almost the whole countries and some of the countries story was a legend and fable.)

The wolf was trying to arrest toad because he was in the jail for robbing a huge piece of diamond, but he escaped from the jail. But wolf got the information that toad was working at hotel. When the wolf got to the hotel, he found toad working on the front desk. When the Wolf started to speak to Toad, Toad was very surprised that Wolf found him.

  Wolf asked toad the reason for escaping the jail, Toad answered that he wants to live healthy and get rich. When they were talking, there was a huge voice like fighting from the second floor. The Wolf told Toad to stay at the front desk and went to the second floor. When the wolf opened the door where the voice came from, there was a woodman and woman fighting.

  Wolf tried to stop them from fighting, woodman punched Wolf’s face. Then wolf started to fight with Woodman.

Once upon a time mid night at fairy town, the wolf was riding a taxi and he was trying to go where toads are. (Toad is in the fairy tail that was made almost the whole countries and some of the countries story was a legend and fable.)

The wolf was trying to arrest toad because he was in the jail for robbing a huge piece of diamond, but he escaped from the jail. But wolf got the information that toad was working at hotel. When the wolf got to the hotel, he found toad working on the front desk. When the Wolf started to speak to Toad, Toad was very surprised that Wolf found him.

  The Wolf asked toad the reason for escaping the jail, Toad answered that he wants to live healthy and get rich. When they were talking, there was a huge voice like fighting from the second floor. The Wolf told Toad to stay at the front desk and went to the second floor. When the wolf opened the door where the voice came from, there was a woodman and woman fighting.

  When Wolf tried to stop them from fighting, woodman punched Wolf’s face. Then wolf started to fight with Woodman. When they where fighting, Wolf threw woodman from the window and he crashed on the car. Then, Toad got out from the hotel and when he saw that the car was smashed, Toad was very mad because it was the toad’s car that was smashed. But the woodman got up and ran away.

 The wolf asked the woman, “Are you the red riding hood?” Then the women answered, “Yes.” Then Wolf asked, “What happened?” She answered that Woodman was drunk and tried to steal her money, so they started to argue and they fought.

O S succeeded.

303 to 198.

Love Story

Oct. 28, 2013

                         Their love story started in California with. When I was 18 years old and working as a waitress at a little family restaurant, I met a guy who was 10 years older than me. He was the one who came before Matthew. Somewhere during all this I hate to skim over this because it’s very important, but let’s just say that I KNEW I had to decide what I wanted for my future to look like and start taking active steps towards attracting that future. And staying in my current relationship at the time was a major roadblock. So one day the breakup finally happened. On my future in-laws without even knowing it. When he was in town, would always go to eat there and would hear about me then, too. But for some reason, I was never working when Matthew happened to stop in with his parents, and our paths never crossed. But then one day, our paths did cross. And to make it all the more strange, I wasn’t even working that day the encounter was, TRULY, by chance. Then we lived happily ever after and had fun together.

Love Story

Oct. 28, 2013

                         Their love story started long before in California with Matthew and I ever actually met. When I was 18 years old and working as a waitress at a little family restaurant, I met a guy who was 10 years older than me. He was the one who came before Matthew. We dated for three and half years, and even lived together during the last year and half of that relationship. They moved into a tiny little house and owned Gracie and Cooper together and our relationship was never terrible. He was a good guy, I was a good girl, and they really did love each other.
And being alone TERRIFIED me. Somewhere during all this, I read the book The Secret that is all about the law of attraction. I really, really believed in what it said. It inspired me. I realized that I had not arranged my life in a way that allowed for all the things I so desired. I hate to skim over this because it’s very important, but let’s just say that I KNEW I had to decide what I wanted for my future to look like and start taking active steps towards attracting that future. And staying in my current relationship at the time was a major roadblock. So one day the breakup finally happened. On my future in-laws without even knowing it. When he was in town, would always go to eat there and would hear about me then, too. But for some reason, I was never working when Matthew happened to stop in with his parents, and our paths never crossed. But then one day, our paths did cross. And to make it all the more strange, I wasn’t even working that day—the encounter was, TRULY, by chance.

EI, good work.

278 to 178.

                                            HORROR STORY!
One day, a girl named Lira gathered her girlfriends: Monika, Erika to tell fortunes. It was Halloween. Girls turn light of. Erika - “When will Lira marry? Page 15 line from bottom. No girls with that name! Everyone laughed. Monika -“What Lira does learn in our class? Page one hundred. top”. Monika read -What the complete phrase? – asked Lira. The stranger asked he comes down subway, in return I nodded. Then they stopped, after Lira went her music school. At the entrance sat woman, similar old witch. Lira said politely:” My name is Lira Martin”. “Lira?” – Checked the old witch-“ha, wrong name– Lira offended. Ask the parents .Lira came home she was crying. Witch said that her name is not Lira! Many years ago this woman worked where they give theres names.Her mother sent dad come the entrance for certificate then buy diapers in pharmacy. They agreed that the call girl Lira. Dad was drunk, began to write Lira, confused and wrote diapers. A wicked witch did not pay attention, and she get name pharmacy.
                           

                                            HORROR STORY!
One day, a girl named Lira gathered with her girlfriends: Monika, Erika to tell fortunes. As that time was Halloween. And Girls had to turn the light of, and tell a story. Erika asked- “When will Lira marry? Page 15, 78th line from the bottom. The book said- In our class no girls with that name! Everyone laughed. Monika asked a question, “What exactly Lira does learn in her class? Page one hundred. 3’d line from the top”. Monika counted the lines and read the sentences. What there is complete phrase? – asked Lira. The stranger asked me if he comes down this street to the subway, and in return I nodded – said girlfriend. Then they stopped talking so after a while Lira went to her music school. At the entrance sat a new woman, similar to the old witch. Lira said politely:” My name is Lira Martin”. “Lira Martin?” – Checked the old witch-“ha ha, that’s the wrong name, what’s my name? – Lira offended. Ask the parents - was the answer. Lira came home and she was crying. Her mum asked her – why are you crying? Lira said that the said that her name is not Lira! Mother said: many years ago this woman worked where they give theres names.Her mother then sent dad to come in and apply for, the certificate and then go and buy diapers in a pharmacy for the baby. Mom and dad agreed that the call girl Lira. But Dad was drunk, began to write in a statement Lira, confused and wrote diapers. A wicked witch did not pay attention, andr she get name pharmacy
                            THE END .....

CM, well done.

297 to 208.

Next day, Sinhae and Minho went outside because Minho had to meet someone, and

he told Sinhae that he had a meeting. So he left Sinhae in the car and told her to stay, but

she didn’t, because she felt sorry and she wanted to know who he’s meeting.

So, when Sinhae was walking around there, she met a girl, Minho’s girl friend, Jiwon.

And Jiwon started to get mad at Sinhae because she hates every girl who is friend with

Minho. Because of few problems that Sinhae had, she couldn’t go to Korea and had to

stay in Minho’s house for few more days. After, she decided to call her friend, Haesueng,

because she knew he’s also in U.S.A.

Later, Haeseung found Sinhae , so Sinhae went to his

house. She left quickly because Jiwon told Haeseung where she was. But when she was

going to leave, Minho felt sad and Jiwon felt happy. When Sinhae was  

leaving, Minho stopped her and said, “Why do you have to go?” and Sinhae

explained, “Because, there’s no reason for me to stay here…” And from that day, Minho

started to like her. So, he followed Sinhae to Korea. But few days later, three of them met in

Korean University.

Next day, Sinhae and Minho went outside because Minho had to meet someone, and

he told Sinhae that he has a meeting. So he left Sinhae in the car and told her to stay, but

she didn’t, because she felt sorry for him and she also wanted to know who he is meeting.

So, when Sinhae was walking around the shopping mall, she met who Minho was meeting,

his girl friend, Jiwon. And Jiwon started to get mad at Sinhae because she just hates another

girl who knows her boy friend. Because of few problems that Sinhae and Minho had, Sinhae

couldn’t go back to Korea for few days and had to stay in Minho’s house for few more days.

Of course because of that, Jiwon because more angry. So, she decided to call her friend,

Haesueng who is also the same age as her, because she knew he is also in U.S.A. to study

more harder and he is going to a university in U.S.A.

Few hours later, Haeseung found out where Sinhae  was, so she went to his

house. She left faster because Jiwon told Haeseung where she was. But when she was going

to leave, Minho seemed to feel sad and Jiwon seemed to feel happy about Sinhae going to

Korea. When Sinhae was just going to leave him, he grabbed her arm and said, “Why do

you have to go?” and Sinhae explained, “Because I wasn’t really going to stay in your house,

you were just helping me…and I’m going to go back to Korea tomorrow.” And from that day,

or actually from few days before, Minho started to like her. So, Next day, he followed Sinhae

to Korea. But few days later, Sinhae, Minho, Jiwon and also Haesueng met in Korean

University.

M S, 736 to 212?!

I think you sent me the wrong file.

A Visitor from the Past

Hello, I’m Helen. I have brown hair and blue eyes. One day, walking, I found a girl called Ellen. She said she came from the past. I thought she was joking. I asked, “Why did you come to the future?”, “Yesterday, because of the fight with your grandfather, your mother ran away from home.” “If my mother and grandfather didn’t have a fight, I was born in wealthy house!?” I asked my mother about that day.

My mother answered “I was born in poor house. My parents didn’t have money to support me. They decided to have me adopted. Few days later, I was adopted into your grandfather’s house, but I fought with him always. Then I decided to run away from that house....” When I heard that story, I just thought I want to meet my grandfather. My mother didn’t accept easily to meet him. Ellen told me the place where my grandfather is living. She gave up, and decided to try to meet my grandfather.

There’re many workers, and rooms in my grandfather’s house. I found my grandfather. He said “Please come back to my house.” It was hard decision to make. We decided to go back to my grandfather’s house…

Fantasy                                                                                                                     7-2 Mia Sakurai

A Visitor from the Past

Hello, my name is Helen. I have brown hair and blue eyes. This is a story in 2000, and I’m 13 years old. But I started to feeling board at my school life. One day, when I was walking to home from school, I found a girl who was getting lost. That girl also had a brown hair, and blue eyes. I tried to speak to that girl. Then that girl said, “I want to go to this house” pointing the map. That house which she pointed was my house. I surprised and said, “This is my house!” The girl who was getting lost was also surprised, and said, “So you are my grandchild, and you’re Helen!” “Yes, I’m Helen, but who are you?” I said. Then the girl answered, “I’m Elen. Actually, I came from past. So I’m your grand-grandmother!” I thought she was joking, so I asked, “Ok, then how did you come to the future?” Then she started to explain how she came… She talked so fast. So I don’t remember exactly what she said, but I remember she said someone introduced time machine. It is like a small rocket, and when it goes up to the sky, she go to any place and any time. Then she showed a 1950’s newspaper. I started believe Elen. “So why did you come to the future?”, “Yesterday, your mother and your grandfather had a fight, and your mother ran away from the house. Then you were born.” “So if my mother and grandfather didn’t have a fight, I was born in wealthy house!?” I said. I really wanted know the truth. So I decided to ask my mother about that day. First, my mother said nothing. But I didn’t give up. Then on my birthday, my mother told me, “what do you want for your birthday present?” I said, “I want to know what happened between you and my grandfather.” Finally, my mother started talking about her past…

“Actually, I was born in very poor house, so my parents didn’t have money to support me. Then my parents decided to have me adopted. Few days later, your grandfather came. I was adopted into your grandfather’s house, but he didn’t like me. So I fought with him many times. Then I decided to ran away from that house... After few years later I married with your father, and you were born.” When I heard that story, I just thought I want to meet my grandfather and I asked to my mother to meet my grandfather. My mother didn’t accept easily, but Elen helped me, she told me the place where my grandfather is living, and I said that to my mother, then she gave up, and decided to try to meet my grandfather.

            I told Elen about my mother. But I was wondering why she knows my name, and why there isn’t time machine now. She came from past. So I asked her, then she said that the name of you were already decided. That means, my mother abide by the rule.  “But there isn’t time machine now!” I said, then Elen answered “maybe, we broke it after I went back to the past.” Suddenly, the rocket landed front of us. It was a time that Elen has to go back to past. I said “thank you for coming”, and she backed to past.

My grandfather’s house was very big. There’re many workers, and rooms. But I started to be excited about my grandfather. My mother looked so nervoused… The guides led us into a room. In that room, there was an old man.  That was my grandfather. His face looked angry. So I thought he is angry to my mother and still don’t like her. Then, my mother said this is Helen and she is my daughter. When my mother said so, my grandfather changed his face, and said “Thank you for coming back.” We felt relieved when we heard his nice words. After we talked a lot, my grandfather started saying us to come back to this house. It was hard to decide for us, but we decided to go back to my grandfather’s house…

Now, I’m going new school, and I have a lot of friends. If I didn’t meet Elen I was spending board school life. Thanks to Elen, I’m spending happy days.

M K hasn't sent me the edited version...

307 to...

            A man called Gravity was in Earth. He was a guy who always saves people by moving things around. He was living in Earth for many years after there was a big battle against evil and justice.

            In 20XX, the world started to move again. A kid named Benjamin Gravity lived on America. He was a kid and went to an ordinary school. He did not have many friends, because he was kind of a nerd than you expect. He was a nerd on math and science. After he came back home from his school, he went to his room and went to do his homework. He opened the textbook and saw How to Make Gravity He went back of the page and saw that this textbook was not from school. It was from planet Jupiter.

            He began to think hard and looked at the textbook again. It said that you will have to do this alone, because he was the representative of planet Earth and had the most gravity on Earth. He did not get this and thought that it may become true. So, he waited and looked at the window. It was dark.... but the time in clock said 3 pm. He looked up. He saw a spaceship. It was written, Gravity Force Central 1. He thought it was time to go now.

            Benjamin Gravity went into the spaceship. He was the only one who was in it. Then, the spaceship began to move slowly and went to another place. It was space. He jumped out he was able to move freely, because he was the first Gravity man ever. The creatures, which were about 2000 of them, came. Now he understood that it was the same thing that happened in his dream. The battle begins.

            A legendary man called Gravity was here on Earth. He was a guy who always saves people by moving things around freely. He was living on Earth for many years after there was a big battle against evil and justice.

            In 20XX, the world started to move again a little by little. A kid named Benjamin Gravity lived on 219street, America. He was an ordinary kid and went to an ordinary school. He did not have many friends, because he was kind of a nerd than you expect. He was a nerd on math and science. After he came back home from his school, he went to his room and went to do his homework. He opened the textbook and saw How to Make Gravity He went back of the page and saw that this textbook was not from school. It was from planet Jupiter.

            He began to think hard and looked at the textbook again. It said that you will have to do this alone, because he was the representative of planet Earth and had the most gravity on Earth. He did not get this and thought that it may become true. So, he waited and looked at the window. It was dark.... but the time in clock said 3 pm. He looked up. He saw a spaceship. It was written, Gravity Force Central 1. He thought it was time to go now.

            Benjamin Gravity went into the spaceship. He was the only one who was in it. Then, the spaceship began to move slowly and went to another place. It was space. He jumped out he was able to move freely, because he was the first Gravity man ever. The creatures, which were about 2000 of them, came. Now he understood that it was the same thing that happened in his dream. The battle begins.

G K cut more than a third.

297 to 185.  However, he did not send it as email attachments, as I told the class to do.

Edited

 

He quickly went back to the original time. At the room there was a memo. It was written, “Sorry about the basketball, but don’t be angry at him, be angry at me. By Edward.” Homes squished the memo. He trashed the memo. When he went to Edward’s house before, there was a room that Edward couldn’t show. He ran as fast as he can. Homes reached Edward’s house. He took out his gun. He went in. Homes hid behind the sofa. As he checked that there was nobody, he walked towards the secret room. He kicked open the door. “Hands up!” In the room, there was James standing. Behind him, there was Edward. Edward shouted, “Kill him!” Then James’ eyes became red.  Things around Homes all flew towards him. When Homes thought that James was only aiming at him, he thought of great idea. He ran towards Edward. Homes reached hands to Edward. Then James controlled a big sofa. The sofa hit Edward. Homes looked back, there was James smiling with his eyes usual. Homes said, “Lets go watch basketball.” They hugged each other.

Original

 

He quickly took out his gun and went back to the original time. At the room there was a memo. It was written, “Sorry about the basketball, but don’t be angry at him, be angry at me. By Edward.” Homes squished the memo in his hand. He threw the memo in to the garbage can. Homes knew where Edward was. When he went to Edward’s house, there was a room that Edward couldn't show. He ran as fast as he can, that was the first time that Homes ran so fast. Homes finally reached to Edward’s house. He took out his gun and placed in front of him. He softly opened the door and went in. Homes hid behind the sofa. As he checked that there was nobody, he quietly walked to the secret room’s door. When he was ready, he kicked open the door and said “Hands up!” In the room, there was James standing, and behind him there was Edward. Edward shouted, “ Kill him.” Then James’ eyes became red again. The things around Homes all flew to him, and he almost got hit. Homes were trying to only kill Edward, but he didn't know how. When Homes thought that James was only aiming him, he found out a great idea. He ran towards Edward. James was still throwing things to Homes. Homes reached hands to Edward and hold him tightly. Then James controlled a big sofa and threw it to Homes, but the sofa hit to Edward because Homes was hiding behind him. Edward got under the sofa. Homes looked back, there was James smiling with his eyes usual. Homes said, “Now, lets go watch basketball again.” They hugged each other for a long time.

After few minuets they reached the basketball stadium.

Well S Y, this will take less time to read.

From 304 to 157 words: almost half cut

            Next, it was supposed to be music but the teacher said you can rest because Alex came. After lunch, girls were talking nonsense about Alex. How tall and handsome he looks. At that moment, I caught Alex staring at me. His face reddens and he turns back. Then, girls started talking about Alex liking me…I thought it was true.

            THEY CAUGHT ME! NOW THEY WILL KNOW I LIKE ANGELINA! It’s all right. Few days later, I started to be nice to her. I answered every question for her and I smiled at her a lot. She seemed to like it.

            Why is Alex nice to me? My friends said Alex likes me. Now I started believing it. When I came back to my home, I sat on my bed and thought about Alex. Why Alex? I don’t like him. I don’t…I like Alex… No! Forget about Alex, but I can’t… I don’t know why… is this love?

Angelina: After this, it was supposed to be music, but the teacher said you can rest, because Alex came. Everyone was happy, because our music teacher was scary. In lunch time, other girls were talking about Alex. How tall he was, how handsome he was, how cool he looks. I DON’T ARGEE WITH THE GIRLS. It was nonsense. And that was the time I caught him staring at me. His face reddens and he turns back. Huh, that’s weird? Then, other girls started talking about Alex and me. They think Alex likes me…I actually thought that it was true also.

            Alex: OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!! THEY CAUGHT ME!!!!!!! NOW THEY WILL KNOW THAT I LIKE ANGELINA!!!!!! Act normal, act normal. Nobody saw me, it’s all right.

Alex: For the next few days, I started to be nice to her. I don’t know why, but I just wanted to. I answered every single question for her, I defended her from other boys, and I smiled at her a lot. She seemed to like it. So, I tried to be nice to her. I hope she liked it.

            Angelina: Okay????? I don’t know why Alex is being nice to me????? I asked my friends, and they all said Alex likes me. Now I started believing it. When I came back to my home, I just sat on my bed and thought about nothing. But, Alex kept coming out in my mind. What happened to me? I don’t like Alex. I don’t like him. I don’t like… don’t like… like… like… I like Alex… Oh my god what am I talking about! Forget about Alex, forget, forget… can’t forget about him… I don’t know why… is this love? Because I feel so light and happy now!